I've been wrestling with this question over the last week. I know that I've even said something like this before - God doesn't desire your ability, but your availability. We preach and teach this at church camp. "Surrender you life to God." "Tell Him your available." And these are good things. We need to surrender. We need to "turn our lives over" to Jesus. But recently it's hit me like a ton of bricks that God desires more than availability. God desires OBEDIENCE.
It's not enough just to say, "I'm here if you need me." It has to be "I will follow you." That means doing, not just being. Again, maybe you've heard something similar, "God is more concerned about your being than your doing." I'm having my doubts. I think God is concerned about both being and doing. For a large part of my early life I felt I was just to supposed to surrender until I became an adult and then I could do what God wanted. It turns out that all that time I should have been doing what God wanted. God's will isn't just about identifying with some sort of career. It's about making godly choices on a daily basis.
I guess what this says to me, is that for me to say I'm available isn't enough. I can't use that as an excuse for a lack of spiritual discipline in my life. God expects me to obey as far as I am able. I need His help that's for sure. And I can find forgiveness when I fail, that's also true. But I can no longer fall back on the "well at least I'm available" or "I'm surrendered" excuse.
I must obey.